When I talk to moms, I hear resignation in what they say …
• Being a stay-at-home mom is supposed to be hard.
• I should just accept the fact that I’m going to be sleep deprived until my son is older.
• I have two healthy, happy girls and a great husband. I shouldn’t want any more than that.
• I hate my job but we need the money. It is what it is.
I hear moms being resigned to their circumstances, living every day where they don’t want to be, believing that this is acceptance.
The difference between resignation and acceptance is like the difference between a long-term lease and an overnight stay. Although these two residences might seem similar, they’re actually worlds apart.
If resignation's motto is “It is what it is,” acceptance says, “This is what it's like right now.”
Resignation sets up house with words like have to, supposed to, and should. Resignation sweeps your difficult feelings under the dusty rugs and reminds you that you have everything you ever wanted, you’re lucky, you have no reason to be unhappy. Resignation sighs as she fills the bookcases and all the shelves with picture book stories of how your life is supposed to look. She pulls back the curtains and shows you the neighbor’s beautiful garden so you can compare your imperfect inside with your neighbor’s perfect outside.
Your journey is different when you approach your challenges with acceptance by your side. Acceptance allows you to acknowledge what you wanted is different from the reality of what you have. Acceptance places frustration, grief, resentment, even disappointment for the sick baby, sucky job, and the endless list of tasks and responsibilities on the table where you can see everything clearly. After wallowing for a bit in the messiness of where you are right now, whether it's your sleep-deprived situation, the bickering in your marriage, or your micro-managing boss, you and acceptance pack up and move on.
Resignation takes up permanent residence, saying “This is where we live.”
Acceptance doesn’t stay.
• Being a stay-at-home mom is supposed to be hard.
• I should just accept the fact that I’m going to be sleep deprived until my son is older.
• I have two healthy, happy girls and a great husband. I shouldn’t want any more than that.
• I hate my job but we need the money. It is what it is.
I hear moms being resigned to their circumstances, living every day where they don’t want to be, believing that this is acceptance.
The difference between resignation and acceptance is like the difference between a long-term lease and an overnight stay. Although these two residences might seem similar, they’re actually worlds apart.
If resignation's motto is “It is what it is,” acceptance says, “This is what it's like right now.”
Resignation sets up house with words like have to, supposed to, and should. Resignation sweeps your difficult feelings under the dusty rugs and reminds you that you have everything you ever wanted, you’re lucky, you have no reason to be unhappy. Resignation sighs as she fills the bookcases and all the shelves with picture book stories of how your life is supposed to look. She pulls back the curtains and shows you the neighbor’s beautiful garden so you can compare your imperfect inside with your neighbor’s perfect outside.
Your journey is different when you approach your challenges with acceptance by your side. Acceptance allows you to acknowledge what you wanted is different from the reality of what you have. Acceptance places frustration, grief, resentment, even disappointment for the sick baby, sucky job, and the endless list of tasks and responsibilities on the table where you can see everything clearly. After wallowing for a bit in the messiness of where you are right now, whether it's your sleep-deprived situation, the bickering in your marriage, or your micro-managing boss, you and acceptance pack up and move on.
Resignation takes up permanent residence, saying “This is where we live.”
Acceptance doesn’t stay.
“Every day is a journey, and the journey itself is home.”
Matsuo Basho
Acceptance knows this cliche is true: Home is where the heart is. Follow your heart on this journey. Let acceptance help you find your way.
Kathleen Ann Harper is a certified life coach for moms and the author of the Amazon bestselling book The Well-Crafted Mom, a resource for moms that’s been described as a “motherhood survival kit.” In her coaching practice, Kathleen helps moms navigate their journey to what feels like home. She integrates coaching and crafts into her work with moms because she believes that we all learn better when we apply more brainpower to the tasks at hand. If you’re feeling a little lost, you can download a free coaching + crafts guide to get a new tool to help you from depleting your energetic and emotional bank account. Or you can make an appointment for a free consultation call with Kathleen to get help with setting your new GPS point to get back on track.
Click here for the free coaching + crafts guide.
Go to thewellcraftedmom.com/schedule to schedule your consultation call.
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